As a mentioned in my earlier post, I quit coffee today. Now I am starting to feel tired. I think that's a good thing. At least I know I'm genuinely tired and not just on a caffeine crash. It's also nice to not feel like I have to run from this feeling, I can face it head on without the help of caffeine. A part of me is tempted to have just a little bit of coffee for a quick pick me up so I can do the kitchen. But that's the issue I use to coffee to ignore a very crucial need. A genuine need for rest. I just can't do that anymore. I believe to be ever present even in my exhaustion is also to be ever present in every other area of my life.
Marriage.................................It's not easy. It is a colorful creation full of ups and downs, highs and lows. And some desperate times. It cannot be done without God. It is His invention and only He can navigate you through it. But marriage is worth fighting for. You don't always have the energy to fight anymore and that's ok. It's ok to not be ok. It's ok to not be ok with your marriage. It's ok to not be ok with your life. Just know that not being ok, with your marriage, doesn't mean that it's over. Not being ok, with your life, doesn't mean that its over. In the last couple weeks I have struggled with temptations of epic magnitude. God has seen me in my struggle. Struggling with my emotions. Struggling with my desires. Struggling to stay faithful. He saw me. He didn't look at me and say "I can't believe you are thinking this". He didn't look at me ans say "I...
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