I felt like the Lord placed 2 things on my heart yesterday. I heard the following statement: "Start living your life again" then I felt the Lord dealing with me about a critical spirit. It shows me that the Lord doesn't desire to put our lives on hold while He fixes us, but He desires to work in our lives in the different areas of weakness as He continues to bless us and use us in mighty ways for His kingdom. Sometimes I let my flaws stop me in my tracks. When my weaknesses show through I get embarrased and I also feel like God might not use me as a result or that God might not want to hear or answer my prayers. But God is not like that. He is not critical in that way of us. The bible says that "He knows our frame and He remembers that we are dust". But sometimes I think that when we are critical of ourselves, it means we somehow think that we are capable on our own of doing the things we need to do. We are not, we need God to help us, His strength is made perfect in weakness. I believe that when we come to the true knowledge of how helpless we really are without God the critical spirit can be broken. We we realize, I mean REALLY realize "apart from Him we can do nothing". Sometimes we know it in our minds but we don't really believe it in our hearts because we are still striving to be something we just can't be apart from God. God does not want us to be uptight do-gooders. He simple wants us to rest and rely on Him. Rest and Rely. If at anytime in our Christian walk the enemy tries to plague us with guilt for not being perfect or doing everything that's right, we should remembe to "rest and rely" on God. Rest in Him while you wait on your change, because it's coming. Rely on Him to change you from the inside out because He will do it. REST AND RELY!
Marriage.................................It's not easy. It is a colorful creation full of ups and downs, highs and lows. And some desperate times. It cannot be done without God. It is His invention and only He can navigate you through it. But marriage is worth fighting for. You don't always have the energy to fight anymore and that's ok. It's ok to not be ok. It's ok to not be ok with your marriage. It's ok to not be ok with your life. Just know that not being ok, with your marriage, doesn't mean that it's over. Not being ok, with your life, doesn't mean that its over. In the last couple weeks I have struggled with temptations of epic magnitude. God has seen me in my struggle. Struggling with my emotions. Struggling with my desires. Struggling to stay faithful. He saw me. He didn't look at me and say "I can't believe you are thinking this". He didn't look at me ans say "I...
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