Since I had my very first child 3 years ago I feel like I have been to a certain extent removed from the world. I went to the dentist today and it's been way to long to mention since i've been. Even though I have extreme anxiety, I'm so glad I went. It feels like I'm "functioning" again. I'm now working for my husband's business, keeping his books on the accounting side. It's nice to be off the hamster wheel of taking care of my daughter, sleeping, cooking cleaning. This cycle gets old; and you welcome a healthy distraction from it. It doesn't mean I'll stop the other stuff. It just means those other things are not my only focus anymore. Even now as I sit here, I need to clean the kitchen really bad, but that's not my only focus anymore. Plus I'm learning that if it really needs to be done it will get done. Thank God for that!
Marriage.................................It's not easy. It is a colorful creation full of ups and downs, highs and lows. And some desperate times. It cannot be done without God. It is His invention and only He can navigate you through it. But marriage is worth fighting for. You don't always have the energy to fight anymore and that's ok. It's ok to not be ok. It's ok to not be ok with your marriage. It's ok to not be ok with your life. Just know that not being ok, with your marriage, doesn't mean that it's over. Not being ok, with your life, doesn't mean that its over. In the last couple weeks I have struggled with temptations of epic magnitude. God has seen me in my struggle. Struggling with my emotions. Struggling with my desires. Struggling to stay faithful. He saw me. He didn't look at me and say "I can't believe you are thinking this". He didn't look at me ans say "I...
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