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Open heart surgery, again???

The bible says that from the days of John the Baptist that the kingdom of heaven suffers violence and the violent take it by force.  The amplified bible describes it as "a precious prize-a share in the heavenly kingdom is sought with most ardent zeal and intense exertion.." When you think of violence, you think of sweat, blood, and tears.  Think about the passion of Jesus, the passion that led him to the cross.  I love the movie "The Passion of Christ" because it depicts the real bloodiness and brokeness of what Christ endured. 

There are some Children of God right now, placing an unspeakable demand on God, to which He gladly supplies.  They are pulling out heavens resources through praying, reading the word, and giving of themselves.  But faith is the drive of these things.  Faith drives it all.  They believe God is who He says He is and that He will do what He says He will do.

I have went under the knife of God before.  I use the word knife because the bible says that the Word of God is sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing even to the division of sould and spirit, and of joints and marrow.  I say this because I have experienced immense pain early on in my life as a Christian.  It was painful at points to submit myself to God and let Him work on me and change me from the inside out.  Even now, as I consider going back into the mode of being one of those violent people who take the kingdom of heaven by force, I ponder if I'm ready to go under the knife of God again.  Going under the knife of God means ceasing from your own self-protective measures and letting God protect you, it means to stop being preoccupied with the tangible needs of your life and seek after the intangible.  As you do this trust God to provide the tangible.  He knows what you have need of.  It is a violent aggresive, abandonment of oneself.  Now don't get it twisted, this should not mean that you stop being available to those around you.  Matter-a-fact you should be more available to those around you, that need you.  It doesn't mean going into a bubble and neglecting your present responsibilities.  It should result in more excellence in your responsibilitites.  I'm claiming that in the name of Jesus. 

As a work-at-home mom, I rely on certain things just to survive my present position in  life.  I know to go under the knife of God once again, I have to stop relying on other things and start relying just on him.  Sleep is one of the biggest things I rely on right now.  I have a baby who wakes up in the middle of the night; and I have a husband and a daughter whom are both early birds.  But I might have to test and see if maybe I need to give up some of my sleep just so I can lean more on the Word of God and go under the knife once again.  I say this because I want to be of a certain caliber of person for my husband and for my children, and others outside my home.  I want to have the temperment I need to deal with a budding 5 year old, the passion I need to be the wife my husband needs and the heart that I need to reach out to the community.  I cling to my rest instead of clinging to God.  I cling to my downtime, I cling to my sleep.  I confess that, I ask for forgiveness and I pray that you Lord will help me start clinging to You.  Help me to lie down and go under the knife of the word once again.  Help me Lord to not be fearful of what will happen if I do.  In Jesus Name I pray.  Amen

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