Saturday, September 19, 2015

Crazy, sexy me?

So I know my title is kind of "off the beaten path",  but lately God has been taking me off the beaten path.  I have a story about me.  When I accepted Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior, words cannot describe the joy that I felt, and I was glad to be in the house of God every chance I could.  I loved my church home.  Some things started to happen that I didn't pay much attention to, but they had a traumatic impact on me in the long run.  When I began my Christian journey I was totally myself, basking in the joy of my Savior. However, over time I started to cover-up more and more of who I really was, little by little; until I didn't look like myself at all anymore.  I remember the first time one of the women, in the church, gave me something to cover my legs because I had on a skirt.  I want to add that my skirt was knee length.  It's funny because I didn't know why they kept handing me this, I don't know what it was, a cloth to cover up.  This was during the sermon so I would quietly say "No, I'm fine".  I thought that maybe it was a courtesy in case I was cold.  I didn't really grow up in the church so I wasn't familiar with church protocol regarding the matter of covering up, if you had a skirt on.  But after some days I figured out what they were trying to do, and I was kind of offended and I don't know why.  But I just decided I would not sit that close to the front of the sanctuary anymore, if I was wearing a skirt.  That was only the beginning.  I started to also find that I was drawing alot of attention to myself, but it was not on purpose.  It was not my purpose at all, but it was happening so I got very self conscious about how I was dressing.  I started to only wear baggy clothes, I stopped keeping my hair done, and I stopped wearing makeup.  I just really started to try to play down my beauty.  I think I was use to that attention when I was in other places, but I was so naive, because I didn't think I would draw that type of attention in church.  It caught me off guard and I thought it was the right thing to do, to start to cover up.  During that time, I had a discussion with a very close friend who had a strong walk with God and he began to ask me why I was dressing like I was, why was everything so baggy?  And I told him why; and he told me that I didn't have to cover up myself, he told me I should not be afraid of my own beauty.  He told me that I should not feel like I have to play down my beauty because of other people.  I eventually lost some of my pizazz in all that cover-up.  Now I'm on a journey back to my pizazz!!  Back to my crazy, sexy, me.  While I know, as a Christian, that this post might offend some other Christians who feel that the word "sexy" and the word "Christian" should not be used in the same sentence.  But I strongly disagree.  To me, the word sexy means attractive, appealing to the senses in a pleasurable way.  To me, God is very attractive, very appealing, and very pleasurable.  I think that the people you meet, who are really on fire for God, would probably agree with me.  Every Christian I have ever met, with a vibrant relationship with the Lord comes off as very attractive.  Jesus is attractive, He is intriguing, He is provocative.  God made us, so we are attracted to certain attributes for a reason.  God embodies many of the characteristics that attract us, as human beings, because we are made in His likeness.     You have to get to know Him outside of "religion".  Because "religion" can sometimes play it safe, dress it up, cover it up, make it look safe.  Religion sometimes does not introduce us to a provocative, intriguing, exciting, adventurous, intimate God.  Religion introduces us to a safe, rule-giving, boring, condemning God.  That is so far from the truth about God.  God is in fact very sexy, very attractive, super cool, and very provocative.  To be Christlike means not being safe.  It means being provocative.  Since Jesus is very attractive, He makes you very attractive when you accept Him as your Lord and Savior.    For those that doubt in terms of what I stated here, you should read the Songs of Solomon.  If that's not "sexy" I don't know what is.

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