Tuesday, July 28, 2015

Serious stuff and calling "sin" what it is.

I'm not good at everything and I'm not good at every relationship I have in my life.  I wish I was but I can never be, so I have choose the relationships that are the most important for me excel in.  My relationship with God, my relationship with my husband, my relationship with my children, my relationship with my parents;  in that exact order.  Everything else is important also, but it still remains in the "everything else" category.  There are alot of "important" things in my life that have to be placed in the "everything else" category.  Honestly, there are alot of things that are important to me, but just not as important as the most important things, and I can't do it all. 

There has to come a time in life where we get serious about what's important to us and we have to stopp being stretched too thin, by not identifying the "most important" things. We cannot do anything well when we are stretched too thin.  Honestly, there are some things that I really want to do well in this lifetime.  I want to lead my kids into a healthy, abundant relationship with Christ.  I want to be my husband's support in achieving His God-given purposes in life.  I want to use my unique gifts to to be the best daughter, the best wife, the best mom, and the best businesswoman I can be.  I don't want to achieve anybody else's  "best".  I want to achieve my own best, based on what God has deposited into me.

Let me say something about the bible, in light of the issues we deal with in today's culture. There are things that God tells us "not to do" in the bible. 
1.  He tells us "not to do" certain things because He knows we will be tempted to do these things.  God would not instruct us not to do certain things, if He didn't know we would be tempted. When you are tempted to do something that goes blatantly against what God says in His word, don't say to yourself "God made me this way" and don't say "why would God put the desire here, if He didn't want me to act on it".  In the bible, God is like "Look, I know you are going to want to do certain things.  I know you are going to have strong desires that you are going to want to act on, but lemme tell you this; 'don't do it'.  I know you want to, but don't". 

James chapter 1   13 Let no one say when he is tempted, “I am tempted by God”; for God cannot be tempted by evil, nor does He Himself tempt anyone. 14 But each one is tempted when he is drawn away by his own desires and enticed. 15 Then, when desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, brings forth death.

Now don't get me wrong, I am no "good girl".  I myself have sin in my life.  But I don't call my sin something else, I call it what it is.  I don't say "God gave me this desire".  I admit that it's sin, and I'm struggling with it and I ask for God's help.  Sometimes, it takes years of praying before I even see an improvement in areas where I've struggled with sin.  But I know God does deliver me.  Not right away, but over time as I pray and accept God's forgiveness everyday, I grow and I see myself overcoming things that were once overcoming me.  I believe when people don't call the sins in their lives what they are, and instead sugarcoat them by calling them something else, there is a tremendous amount of guilt and condemnation as a result.  But I believe when we call the sin in our lives "sin", the floodwaters of God's forgiveness is able to enter our hearts.  It's like the scripture below:

Romans 5:8

But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.
This says, just as plain as day, that you don't have to get your life straight to get your relationship straight with God.  He is ready to love you right where you are.  But how will you receive or even know that you need that love if you are lying to yourself about where you really are in your life.  Confession of sin is not about God keeping a list of all our sins, He actually erases our sins.  Confession is important because you can only receive the extravagant love of God, poured out in your life, if you call "sin" what it is, in  your own life.  Don't blame people, don't say God made me this way.  Just call it what it is, admit you struggle with it, admit the bible says it's wrong, and ask God for help and know that He loves you right where you are and at the same time, over time He will help you overcome.  

1 John Chapter 1  9 If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. 

Honestly, this scripture above is about you confessing your sin to God, not other people. What does cleansing "from all unrighteousness" mean.  It doesn't mean making you perfect.  It doesn't mean removing sin completely from your life.  It means that when you are honest with God and with yourself you are no longer "unright" with God.  It is confessing your sin and accepting forgiveness through Christ that makes your right with God.  Unrighteousness means being "unright" with God.  You get your life right with God by saying to God that I need to be saved because I'm a sinner and I need forgiveness.  After that you are made right with God through the blood that Jesus shed for you on the cross, because He paid the penalty for every sin you will commit and have committed and are committing right now.  But how can you receive it if you don't confess that you need it by confessing your sin???  Jesus came to save sinners.  Even to grow once you become a Christian, you have to always be honest with yourself and God about the sin in your life, so it won't have control over your life.   

Tuesday, July 21, 2015

Wednesday - "Are you willing"

I believe people use many different words sometimes to describe the same feelings.  There are times when I believe God is speaking to me, because I keep hearing the same statement resonate in my heart and mind.  I don't know if anybody else, reading this, has ever had a thought, a statement, or an idea (concept), just settle on their hearts.  We don't always know what to do when this happens.  We don't normally accept it right away, right?  We kind of brush it off the first time it comes up, but it just keeps coming up.  My question to you is "What if we believe that it's God speaking to us and we believe what He is saying?".

Sometimes I get nervous when it comes to my clients.  I get nervous because "What if I can't deliver the result that they want?".  As I thought it over this week, this is what I heard in my heart:  "They are not paying you because of some result they are expecting you to deliver.  They are paying you because I commanded the blessing on you"  God doesn't command people in that way, but He commands blessings.  Many times the blessings travel through the hands of others, but it's God who commands the blessing.

Deuteronomy 28:8
“The Lord will command the blessing on you in your storehouses and in all to which you set your hand, and He will bless you in the land which the Lord your God is giving you.

So, what if I believe God is saying this to me and I believe what He said.  If I believe it then I won't stress out anymore about the results.  That sounds weird right?  As a business person we are suppose to be concerned about the results.  But that's not God's way.  Honestly, God just wants you to be a willing vessel and through that, He will produce the results.  That should take the pressure off ourselves.  In every area of our lives, God just wants us to be a willing vessel and He will produce the right results.  The results that are right in His eyes.  Let your hands be willing, let your feet be willing, let your mouth be willing.  That's it.  In a sense we have to set our hands loose to be used, we have to set our feet loose to be used, we have to set our mouths free to be used.  Be used by God.  Don't withhold your hand.  If you have strength in your body and you are willing, set it free to be used.  If you're not willing, pray for the strength and the willingness and God will supply.

Philippians 2:13New King James Version (NKJV)
13 for it is God who works in you both to will and to do for His good pleasure.

Monday, July 20, 2015

Tuesday - There comes a time..

There comes a time.......when we have to stop shrinking back from things that appear to big for us, over our heads, or beyond our qualifications.  Here is what happens:  We experience some success here and there in our lives but we stay where we are comfortable, where we feel we are able.  But God does bring us to a point where somehow, that place where we once felt confident, just doesn't feel right anymore.  It's time to move forward and go beyond that. Somehow, you know that the place where you are comfortable is no longer able to nourish your life.  You gotta keep moving forward putting one foot in front of the other.  I'm cautious because I've been burnt bad, but still moving because I know God is leading me.  When you have reached a place in your life where you have stopped growing, then it's time to seek God and be ready for Him too move you to a place where you can start growing again.

Sunday, July 19, 2015

Monday - "Things are always changing"

As I was watching an old movie I still enjoy just as much as when I was young or even more now; I realized how much things have changed and people have changed since the movie was made.  Even the artists, in the movie, have grown and changed so much. Some have entered into new areas of business and new areas of growth in the entertainment industry.  These artists were trailblazers and now have a position of honor in the music industry because of their earlier efforts and achievements. But my main point was that they did not stay the same.  God stays the same, but everything else and everybody else is constantly changing.  This Monday my focus is that "Things are always changing"  I pray that you let that statement encourage your heart today, because sometimes you feel stuck and sometimes you have been wondering how long you are going to have to do whatever it is you're doing.  Well, things are always changing. God is always moving in your life.  You may not be able to see it or feel it at the time but change is underway.  God wants to get you from point A to point B and His desire is to do it miraculously as you fight against the tides and waves that seek to sway you off your coarse.  When you are constantly fighting the tides and waves that tend to discourage you, it's hard to feel like you are moving forward.  You don't feel like you're going anywhere.  Trust me you are going somewhere, you are moving forward.  Your job is to fight to stay on coarse, God's job is to get you to where you're going.  Pray according to Psalm 121:3, that God will not allow your foot to be moved

Psalm 121:3New King James Version (NKJV)
He will not allow your foot to be moved;
He who keeps you will not slumber.

Look at nature and the seasons, the changes in the trees, the colors of the leaves.  Look at animals and how they go through the changes of seasons.  Don't become fustrated with your life,  as sure as the seasons change is as sure as you can be that you will experience change in your life as well.  This is how God designed it.  Genesis 8:22 says so

Genesis 8:22 New King James Version (NKJV)
22 “While the earth remains,
Seedtime and harvest,
Cold and heat,
Winter and summer,
And day and night
Shall not cease.”

Keeping my mind focused on these things has helped me through years and years of waiting for certain things to take place in my life.  I stand as a living witness to tell you that things change, circumstances change, people change, and life changes.  Believe God!

Wednesday, July 15, 2015

Thoughts for Thursday

What should the Thursday expectations be?????  The week is winding down and today things didn't go exactly as I had wished, but it was a good day.  The week is winding down and I do have some deadlines that I would like to meet.  But I am reminded to not let those deadlines control me.  I cannot give those deadlines a position that they don't deserve.  As a work-at-home mom with 2 kids at home.  Everything must fall in it's proper order of priority on a daily basis.  My first priority is my thoughts towards God, my next priority is my kids.  My mornings are devoted to getting them out for a little while so they don't drive me crazy for the day and so I can get some work done when the time comes.  Noontime ushers in my work time.  My work time only gets about 2 hours of my day.  That's where it fits with my current priorities.  However, somehow God is blessing it and it works out.  The way I prioritize my day is motivated by my peace with God, my desire to be good to my husband, and my desire to be good to my kids.  There is a certain way that things have to fall in order to bring out the best in me and not the worst in me.  I prioritize myself to bring out the best in myself .  I believe that's important.  If you make alot of money or you are a star on your job, what does it matter if you are a jerk to everyone in your family because you're stressed out.  I think it's a good idea to be more in-tune with what the best rhythm is for your life.  My life felt out of rhythm for a while.  Not necessarily because of "what" I was doing, but more so because of "how" I was doing it.  It felt awkward and unnatural and I don't believe life is suppose to feel like that.  Especially because God destined me, before I was in my mothers womb, to become what He designed me to be.  Life should fit.  If life doesn't "fit" for you, it might not be because you need to change what you're doing, but
  maybe  you need to just change how you're doing it.  Find your rhythm.   

“Before I formed you in the womb I knew you;
Before you were born I sanctified you;
I ordained you a prophet to the nations.” (Spoken by God to Jeremiah in Jeremiah 1:5)

Ande Carr
Coach & Trainer
(347) 766-6212  

Tuesday, July 14, 2015

Waiting Wednesday

I think Wednesday is a good day to talk about waiting.  Because I believe we're all waiting for something.  Some of us are just waiting for the end of the week and Wednesday is "hump day".  Others of us might be waiting to see if an opportunity is going to come through.  Some of us might be awaiting some test results that have us nervous.  Some might be simply waiting for a phone call from that special someone.  And you just don't know if they are going to call. Whatever you're waiting for, keep in mind that according to the scripture below, your days are in God's hands.

Psalm 139:16
Your eyes saw my substance, being yet unformed. And in Your book they all were written, The days fashioned for me, When as yet there were none of them.

 As you wait, please know that God has the power to bless you and no man can take that away.  He will command others to bless you, without them even knowing it.

Deuteronomy 28:8
The Lord will command the blessing on you in your storehouses and in all to which you set your hand, and He will bless you in the land which the Lord your God is giving you.

God commands the blessing to come forth; please believe that, as you "wait".  As you approach "hump day", take some time to consider that your days are not in the hands of anybody but God.  No doctor, no person, no disease, no debt ; only God 's hands.  Your days are not in the hands of your employer or even your spouse.  Your days are not in the hands of your children, your neighbors, your friends, or your customers.  Your days are in the hands of God.  And you can trust Him, if you will trust Him.  Please take some time to think about the fact that God alone can "command" the blessing on you in every area of your life.  Are you waiting for your marriage to get better?  God can command the blessing on your marriage.  Are waiting for your finances to get better?  God can command the blessing on your finances.  Are you waiting for your health to get better?  God can command the blessing on your health.   Are you waiting for you children to get better?  God can command the blessing in your children's life.  Are you waiting for your job to get better?  God can command the blessing on you in your job.  Are you waiting for your business to grow?  God can command the blessing on your business.  Are you waiting to get a job?  God can command the blessing on you in your job search.  Yes whatever you are waiting for, it is in the hands of God and He can command that blessing on whatever you are waiting for.  God bless.

Ande Carr
Coach & Trainer
(347) 766-6212

Monday, July 13, 2015

Take Advantage of Tuesday

Hopefully you got some good momentum going for your Monday.  I always try to start the week off slow but strong.  Many times, however I start off, on Monday, sets the stage for how the week is going to go.  It's all about my attitude, what I'm focusing my thoughts on.  If I am bending towards the negative it tends to affect my whole week.  If I am feeling overwhelmed, it tends to affect my whole week.  If I am feeling burnt out, it tends to affect my whole week.  If I am feeling offended, it tends to affect my whole week. The list goes on, but you get my drift.  Mindset is everything for me.  For Tuesday, I feed off the momentum that has started on Monday. On Tuesday, don't let yourself be all over the place, keep up your focus and your momentum.  We all know as we inch towards the end of the week we start to taper off.  I know I do.  My momentum starts to slow around Wed, late afternoon and I start to go downhill with my energy level.  My focus gets a little loose.  But that's alright because I'm human and that's just how I'm wired.  I now embrace it and try to take advantage of when I am strong and have some good momentum and focus, because it will get weaker after a couple days.  There are limits to our momentum and our focus, so don't feel bad about it, just take advantage of when you are focused and you do have good momentum.  Trust me,  it works!!!   I use to be hard on myself because I felt like I didn't have the energy to go, go, go like other people that I knew.  But now I know that it doesn't mean that there is something wrong with me or even that it is something I need to work on.  It just means I'm wired differently and I might need a slower pace, or I might not have as much endurance.  But when I embrace this, it empowers me to know that I should go strong when I am strong.

Ande Carr  
Coach & Trainer
(347) 766-6212

Sunday, July 12, 2015

Monday under control

As I look at the fact that Monday is less than 12 hours away, I'm examining how I feel going into my week.  I'm a feeling tired?  Am I feeling intimidated?  Am I feeling spiritually built up?  Am I ready?  I have to decide tonite (Sunday) that I am not going to be all over the place in my focus, I have to reign all the creative energy in to focus on the main areas of my life right now.  I need to get through my day with 2 young children home with me.  I need to bring my motivation and energy also into the one thing I'm focused on in my professional life.  Honestly, when I look at Monday, I need to be prepared to be there for my kids and set a healthy pace for their day and I need to handle my business matters for a couple hours when my kids are having downtime. That's really it!!!  If Monday has got you down or overwhelmed.  If your to-do list is too long,  think about one thing in each area, that by doing it, it will make everything else easier or unnecessary.  I guarantee that your list will get very short.  Look, my house could definitely be cleaner, my laundry is not folded and dirty clothes are piling up again.  I have dishes and pots in the sink, as we speak that need to be washed.  My black kitchen counters show every inch of dirt the way only "black counters" can show it. Trust me I could have many things on my to-do list tomorrow.  But guess what?  I only have 2 things.  It's the 2 things that will make everything else easier or unnecessary.  My 2 things are
1.  Get my kids out of the house to burn off some energy for a little while
2.  Make cold calls for my business and one of my clients for 2 hours

THat's it!  Get the kids out the house and make cold calls.  "Everything else" doesn't make it onto the list.  Because getting my 2 main things done will make the "everything else" easier.  

Ande Carr
Coach & Trainer
(347) 766-6212

Wednesday, July 8, 2015

Making life easier

Making life easier.....................Somewhere along the way I think it was instilled in me that life was not suppose to be easy, nor should you seek to make life easy.  I am learning that as God brings more into my life, that I have to seek to make life easier in ways where it is possible.  In the past, self-righteousness has kept me from taking the "easy way out".  No, there was so much I wanted to do myself and I thought I was suppose to be able to do myself.  If I couldn't do it myself, that made me a "bad mom" or a "bad wife".  But that self-righteous attitude can rob you from what God truly has in store for you and your family.  That attitude even robs your family.  Learn to ask yourself, everyday "What is the ONE thing I could do today that would make everything else easier or unnecessary?".  The answer might not come to you right away, but if you speak that question out, as your morning progresses, the answers will come.  Asking the right questions at the beginning of your day will give you answers that will make your day run much smoother.  It re-trains your brain to think differently about your day.

We all come to various crossroads in our lives at different points in our lives.  Those crossroads are a blessing from God.  I think it's God giving us an opportunity to look at the path that we have been on, examine where that path has taken us and how we feel about where our current path has taken us.  Then there are options in front of us.  Do we want to keep going on our current path?  Are we happy with the fruits of our current path?  Do we think our current path has anything else to  offer us or our family?  Is our current path going to produce what God wants to produce in our lives in this season?  These questions will help us to determine whether or not it's time to get on another path.  It's not always time.  But God helps us determine when it's time.  He will give us wisdom as we ask these questions.  "Crossroads" are God's way of having us to ask the questions that He wants to answer for us.

As we go about life, the areas where we benefit from "pushing" ourselves, change from one season to the next. If you have been pushing yourself in a certain area for years and you were growing as a result of it, but you have stopped growing.  That's a red flag that it's probably time to focus on a different area of your life.

Ande Carr
Coach & Trainer
(347) 766-6212

Monday, July 6, 2015


Many people if you asked them they wouldn't be able to tell you what they would really love to do with their lives.  Most of us are even afraid to even think that we could do what we truly dream of doing.  We are afraid because:
1.  What if we can never have that which we dream of?
2.  What if I admit to what I really want and I'm not able to pursue it?

I am reading a book that points out that saying "yes" to the one big thing we really want to do, ultimately means saying "no" to alot of other things.  It also means blocking large amounts of time to grow in that area, so we can perfect and master our craft.  Many of us see things as something we just want to do, not something we want to master.  I am learning in my own life that not choosing "the one big thing", in your life, that you want to pursue on a personal level, leads to a life that is kind of all over the place and searching for one's purpose.

In the area of personal development, to choose one thing to spend basically a lifetime developing seems a little extreme right?  Well,I think it sounds a bit extreme, but what if you want extraordinary results in your life?  I have seen the "ordinary" results in the lives of others and my own life, and ordinary is great for a little while but "ordinary" does not seem to be feeding my soul's purpose anymore. I crave more!!!!  Do you??  I don't think there's anything wrong with anyone who doesn't crave more out of life.   I don't think it's about right and wrong, when it comes to this.  I think it's about the individual person and we were each created in the image of God to reflect something different about Him.  It's important to not be afraid of your "craving" for more, but rather explore it.  See what it's all about.  Get more acquainted with what's in your heart.  It can take a very long time, so get started now and take the first step.  Some of us are so scared to take that first step because we know that as soon as they acknowledge what's in their heart, it's going to change their lives and we are not all ready for such a drastic change yet.  That's ok too.  I have realized that if you don't, there will come a point where you start shrinking as a person instead of growing.  You will start to experience "shrinkage" in all the important relationships around you.  My relationships with God and those closest to me are really what's most important in my life.  I'm even at a place in my own life, where I know I have to move forward in my own heart's desires or I will start to experience "shrinkage" in my own life, as an individual.  We have specific seasons in our lives that are optimal for growth, but if we are not careful, to move on when it's time, those same seasons can stunt your growth and you can begin to shrink instead of grow.  My question for you and myself is "Where do I have to go,
in order to grow?"  As a mom and wife, I spend most of my time tending to the needs of my family.  But I'm realizing that if I don't grow, my family will suffer.

Ande Carr
Coach & Trainer

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